HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Birababaza ndetse Bikagora kwakira ububabare bwo kuva murukundo n’uwo mwakundanaga cyangwa mukundana mu gihe zimwe mu mpamvu ziteje ugukonja kwarwo cyangwa guhagarara zitaguturutseho, Biragoye kubyakira kandi umukeneye. Bimwe muri ibi biragufasha kongera kwigarurira uwo ukunda.
1.Banza utekereze impamvu ushaka gusubirana n’uwo ukunda :Ese mu gukonja k’urukundo rwanyu cyangwa gutandukana byatewe n’iki? Ese ni inde nyirabayazana? Ese wowe nta ruhare ubifitemo cyangwa ni we? Ni ijambo rihe ribi yakubwiye cyangwa wowe wamubwiye ryabaye imbarutso? Ese waramubeshye cyangwa yarakubeshye? Ese yagukoreye cyangwa wamukoreye ibintu udakunda cyangwa we adakunda, wamuciye inyuma cyangwa yaguciye inyuma? Ongera usubize amaso inyuma mubyo mwanyuranyemo, wibaze kuri ibyo bibazo byose kuko hari ubwo wasanga gutandukana kwanyu bigufitiye inyungu. Niba ntacyo bigutwaye kumurekura mu gihe atakigushaka, wihatiriza, mureke yigendere kuko hari ubwo wakomeza ukazarushaho kubabara cyangwa kumubabaza.
2. Gerageza kuba uwo yakunze: Mu buzima ubamo, burya ibihe ntabwo bijya bihinduka ahubwo abantu nibo bahinduka. Kenshi abantu bamwe na bamwe iyo bamaze gushyikira urukundo cyangwa abo bakunda, bahindura imyitwarire ugasanga baritwara bitandukanye n’uko uwadukunze cyangwa uwo bakunda yababonye mbere. Ese iyo wisuzumye usanga wowe utarahindutse ugereranije nuko yakubonye mbere? Hindura, ishime, itware neza nka mbere ujya cyangwa aza kugutereta.
3. Ha agaciro ijambo ryambere ugomba kumubwira mu gihe muhuye: Igihe muhuye cyangwa se mu gihe wongeye kuvugana nawe, gerageza kwitondera amagambo ukoresha umubwira. Nawe ubwe arabizi ko yakubabaje, azagerageza kwihagararaho ndetse rimwe na rimwe bye kugira n’icyo bimubwira. Ntuzamwereke ko ubabaye, uzirinde kumubaza ngo ese wabitewe cyangwa wabikoreye iki?. Ndabizi ko ushavuye kubera we ariko wimwereka akababaro kawe na gato. Gerageza kumubwira neza, kumugusha neza no kumwakira nk’uwakira umushyitsi w’imena cyangwa umukiriya.
4. Mwibutse ibihe byiza mwagiranye: Iyo wigeze gukundana n’umuntu, burya ni wowe ushobora kuba wakwigarurira umutima we kurusha undi wese batigeze bakundana, kuko uramuzi kurusha undi wese. Niba uzi umwambaro cyangwa icyo yakundaga kuri wowe byaba byiza aribyo akubonanye muhuye. Mujyane ahantu yakundaga cyangwa umwoherereze ifoto yaho, kora ibishoboka byose kugira ngo umujyane mubihe byiza mwanyuranyemo.
5. Ba Mwiza: Uko waba uri kose, usabwa gusa neza, Kwigirira isuku haba kumubiri no kumyambaro. Reba imyambarire yawe niba iboneye, imyambaro wambaye ibe isa neza iteye ipasi aho bishoboka cyangwa se igoroye, umusatsi n’ubwanwa biratunganije? Mbese, sa neza kugira ngo ugaragare neza imbere y’uwo ukunda
6. Kugira ibanga ryubuzima bwawe: wiba umuntu ushyira ubuzima bwe bwose hanze niba mwatandukanye ntubishyire kumbuga nkoranyambaga ntiwiteze abantu biba bigoye uko wiyumva cyane ko uba ubabaye gusa jya ugerageza ubihishe wenda ubibwire nkinshuti yahafi imwe itagutaranga .
7. Kurira uriwenyine: nibyo koko iyo umuntu ababaye agira agahinda akumva muriwe akeneye kuruhuka akenshi amarira arizana wibitangira rero rira bizagufasha kumva uruhutse muri wowe kandi uririre ahabantu batakureba wenda niba ufite inshuti yawe wizera ushobora nko kuyegera ukayibwira ibyawe ukarira ukumva uruhutse kandi uko uzatangira bimeze siko uzarangiza ugifite agahinda birashira kuburyo niyo muhuye nawamusore abona ko ukomeye kuko uba wararize ukiyakira bigatuma iyumubonye utahita urira.
8. Muce amazi kandi muri displine: naguhamagara ntuhite umwitaba nunabikora jyujya ahantu harurusaku wenda nko mubantu benshi cg hafi ya television aboneko uri mubyawe utamwitayeho wishimye cg umubwire uti ndahuze ndibukuvugishe nyuma hanyuma uze kutabikora kandi ubishaka nazongera umubwireko wabyibagiwe azabona ko utamwitayeho yumve yifuje gusubirana kugirango age akuvugisha uko abishaka.
9.Wihubuka: harigihe utandukana numuntu ugahita ufata icyemezo uhubutse wenda ugahita utangira gukundana nabandi bahungu cyangwa agahita wishora mubiyobyabwenge cyangwa ugahita ujya mubigare byabantu bibirara mbega ukaba icyihebe muri wowe ugakora ibyamukwibagiza byose sibyiza bituma niyo agutekereje abonako wabaye undi muntu.
10. Rema uburyo mwahura urikumwe numuntu yangaga: harigihe uba urikumwe numuntu yanga cyangwa nkuwagutereser ukamwanga shaka uburyo mwahura murikumwe wenda niba uzi nkahantu akunda gusohokera cyangwa kujya ubizi neza kwahari kandi ukore kuburyo ababona mwishimye muganira bizatuma muriwe afuha yumve ashatse kumukwambura age nokubaza amakuru asange mutanakundana.
11. Tangira umukure mubantu wafataga nkuwingenzi mubuzima bwawe : birumvikana ko abantu bakunda bafatanya muribyose byashoboka ko wagiraga icyibazo akaba ariwe muntu wambere ubibwira gusa ugomba guhita ubihagarika birashobokako wenda wacyeneraga amafaranga akaba ariwe ubwira nabyo ntuzongere kubikora yabona ko ucyimukeneye shaka ubundi buryo wajya wajya uyabona wenda niba ufite amafaranga ushake nkakantu watangira gukora azabona ko utakimwitayeho akugarukire.
Ntago byoroshye kubikurikiza gusa uramutse ubukoze ufite umusore wakwanze ariwe biturutseho azakugarukira byihuse nubona bitabaye uzamureke ubwo ntago azaba yaragukundaga byukuri kandi niba ubona ushobora kumugarura akakwangiriza ubuzima kurushaho uzamureke wige kubaho utamufite.
