HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Imyitwarire umuntu agira mu rukundo niyo iruha kuramba cyangwa gusenyuka. Igihe ukeneye kugumana n’umukunzi wawe, hari uburyo uba ugomba kwitwara bya buri munsi.
Niba ufite imwe muri iyi myitwarire, umenye ko ufite umwanzi uzirana n’urukundo ndetse uzarurimbura buke buke kugeza rurangiye ukabura umukunzi wari warahariye ubuzima bwawe.
1.Kutemera guhana umwanya
Kuba mu rukundo n’umuntu ntibivuze ngo muhorane buri gihe. Ni ngombwa ko buri wese agira igihe cyo kuba ari wenyine. Muhane umwanya buri umwe ahumeke anitekerezeho ni bura rimwe mu gihe runaka. Wirinde kumva ko niba agusabye kumureka akaba ari wenyine ari uko atakwiyumvamo, ahubwo umureke yisanzure. Guhora mwikubana bisenya urukundo mu ibanga kuko buke buke mugenda muhararukwana ukazisanga ntakidasanzwe akikubonamo.
2.Kudafuhira umukunzi wawe
Mu rukundo uba ugomba kwitwara nk’ufite ubutunzi bukomeye kandi ushaka kugumana nabwo bityo ukanyuzamo ugafuhira umukunzi wawe ariko bidakabije. Bituma uwo mukundana yiyumvamo ko agufitiye umumaro kuko kumufuhira bimwereka ko umukeneye. Gusa wibuke ko gufuha birenze ntampamvu nabyo bisenya urukundo. Ugomba kubyitwararika ukamwereka ko umukeneye ariko mu kinyabupfura.
3.Kwihunza ikiganiro gikomeye
Rimwe na rimwe mujya mukenera kuganira ku ngingo ikomeye umwe akaba yahora abisubika kuko yumva iyo ngingo idatuma yisanzura, itamuha agahenge, cyangwa akumva atayikunze. Igihe cyose uba ugomba kugaragaza ubushake bwo kuganira n’umukunzi wawe cyangwa uwo mubana ku ngingo runaka. Iyo ukomeza kumwima umwanya bituma yibaza impamvu bityo urukundo rwanyu rugatangira kugana ahabi.
4.Guhora ubona ibintu nabi
Hari abantu badakunda umuntu uhora abona ko ibintu byose byarangiye. Buri gihe ntugire ikintu ubona mu buryo bwiza, aba akenshi bahora ari ba maganya ntiwakumva aho yashimye ikintu. Iyi myitwarire ntawe uyikunda, ntawifuza kuba iruhande rw’umuntu utagira ijambo ryamutera akanyabugabo. Niba witwara uko umenye ko ufite umwanzi w’urukundo uzarusenya gake gake mu ibanga.
5.Gushaka ikintu binyuze mu kwirakaza
Bamwe mu bakundana bajya bagira amakosa yo kuba agushakaho ikintu akibyimya ngo uzakimuhe aho kukigusaba. Ese uba wumva bizamutwara imbaraga zingana iki ngo amenye icyo ushaka utigeze uvuga ? Ikiza ni ugutanga ubutumwa bwawe mu kabiganiraho aho guceceka ngo umushyire mu mayira abiri ayoberwe impamvu wacecetse. Ibi bikunze kubaho cyane cyane iyo mwagiranye akabazo umwe agahitamo kwirakaza mu gihe runaka nyamara siko gukemura ikibazo. Uwo ubikorera ageza aho akabirambirwa.
6.Kudohoka ku kwiyitaho
Igihe cyose uri mu rukundo uba ugomba gushyira imbaraga mu kwiyitaho. Niba umuntu agukunze abona umeze neza, ugira isuku, wambara neza, uba ugomba gukomerezaho aho kudohoka ngo wicupize. Uba ugomba kwereka umukunzi wawe ko ufite ubushake bwo gukomeza kuba mwiza umubereye. Bitabaye ibyo, azakuramo ake karenge.
7.Gushyira hanze agaseke mubikamo ibitagenda neza
Mu rukundo uba ugomba kubika ibanga ry’ibyo munyuramo uko byaba bimeze kose. Guhora uganira amakosa y’umukunzi wawe n’abo hanze ni amakosa akomeye. Ibyo igihe abyumvise bituma akubonamo umuntu udashobotse, utagira agatekerezo mbese wa biri hanze. Nta muntu rero wifuza gukundana n’umuntu utabasha gucunga umunwa we.
8.Gushyira hanze agaseke mubikamo ibitagenda neza
Mu rukundo uba ugomba kubika ibanga ry’ibyo munyuramo uko byaba bimeze kose. Guhora uganira amakosa y’umukunzi wawe n’abo hanze ni amakosa akomeye. Ibyo igihe abyumvise bituma akubonamo umuntu udashobotse, utagira agatekerezo mbese wa biri hanze. Nta muntu rero wifuza gukundana n’umuntu utabasha gucunga umunwa we.
9.Kutamutega amatwi
Kuba babura baje imbere y’umukunzi wawe ni ikosa rikomeye. Itumanaho ni ingenzi hagati yanyu ku buryo niba muri kumwe ukeneye kugaragaza ko uhari. Wimuharira ikiganiro, wibuke ko kugira ngo ubashe gutanga ubutumwa bigendana no kubasha gutega amatwi.
10Kutamenya gushimira
Ni byiza ko urukundo rwanyu rugira intego yo gukomera no kuramba. Kora uko ushoboye umukunzi wawe abone uburyo umushimira, uburyo kuba ahari ari ingenzi kuri wowe. Niba uri indashima ntazifuza kuhaguma, muhe impamvu ituma ahaba kubwawe.
11.Gutanga ibitekerezo by’ubwana
Niba muganira reka kuyobya ikiganiro ku ngingo runaka ngo ukimwerekezeho. Igihe cyose vuga ibintu bigaragaramo ko uri mukuru uganire nk’ufite ibitekerezo. Ibi bishoboka iyo mushaka kumvana bitari ugukomeretsanya cyangwa gucyurirana. Ntawe uzifuza kuganira n’umuntu w’imyaka 30 utanga ibitekerezo nk’iby’umwana w’imyaka 12.
