HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Urubuga Elcrema rutangaza ko hari ibintu bishobora kukwereka ko uri mu rukundo rw’agahararo(ruhutiyeho) cyangwa urw’ukuri nk’uko tugiye kubireba muri iyi nkuru.
1.Mu rukundo nyarwo,habaho kuganira no kungurana ibitekerezo ku mishinga runaka ishobora kubateza imbere ndetse bakagira n’umwanya uhagije wo kuganira ku rukundo.
2.Urukundo ruhutiyeho rurangwa akenshi n’utugambo tworoshye turyoshye tw’ubusabusa abantu barurimo babwirana ariko muri make ntamushinga cyangwa undi musaruro bigaragara ko wavamo.
3.Urukundo nyarwo ntirugendera ku bintu runaka bidasanzwe bigaragara ku bakundana nk’ibyagaragaye hejuru, ahubwo iyo abakundana bari murukundo nyakuri bumva banyuzwe n’uko bari. Mu yandi magambo baba barimariranyemo.
4.Urukundo ruhutiyeho rwibanda cyane ku bice bimwe na bimwe by’umubiri umuntu aba yarakundiye undi urugero: isura,ikimero,imigendere,inseko,kuberwa ubutunzi n’ibindi.
5.Iyo urukundo nyarwo rugaragayemo agatotsi, abakundana ntibihutira gutandukana ahubwo bashobora no kumara igihe babyigaho bakazafata umwanzuro nyuma ndetse byanaba ngombwa bagakomezanya.
6.Mu rukundo ruhutiyeho,iyo habayeho kutumvikana, abakundana bahita batandukana byihuse kuko buri wese aba yumva nta kibazo ko azabona abandi bameze nka we.
7.Mu rukundo nyakuri,abakundana ntibafuhirana bya cyane ahubwo bahana akanya ko kuganira n’izindi nshuti n’abavandimwe. Uru rukundo nyakuri iyo urugenzemo neza, na za nshuti n’imiryango birabashyigikira.
8.Urukundo ruhutiyeho rutuma umwe mu bakundana yica ku bandi bantu kuko aba yumva arangamiye umuntu umwe gusa kubera cya kintu amukurikiyeho, nyamara iyo amaze kukigeraho cyangwa bashwanye arabagarukira.
9.Iyo mu rukundo ruhutiyeho habayeho kutumvikana ku mpande zombi zumva ko byazicikiyeho aho kureba icyakorwa mu gihe urukundo nyakurirwo rutegereza kandi rukihangana.
10.Urukundo ruhutiyeho akenshi ruganisha ku mibonano mpuzabitsina mu gihe urukundo nyakuri rwereka abarurimo ko imibonano mpuzabitsinaatari cyo kimenyetso cyonyine kigaragaza abakundana.
11.Urukundo ruhutiyeho rurafuha cyane (Jealous) ariko mu by’ukuri nuko haba hari inyungu idasanzwe abarukundana babi temo. Mu gihe hatabaho gufuha cyane ku bakundana urukundo nyarwo kuko bagirirana icyizere.
12.Urukundo ruhutiyeho rurangwa nuko abakundana bishimira kuratira abandi ibyo bakoze (namusomye, twasohokanye,…) mu gihe abari mu rukundo nyakuri baraceceka abantu bakabibwirwa n’uko babyiboneye.
N’ubwo urukundo ruhutiyeho rushobora gukura rukavamo urukundo nyarwo, ntirukunze kuramba kuko indamu abarukundana baba barutegerejeho baba bamaze kuzibona. Si byiza gukunda cyangwa gushakana n’umuntu kuko hari icyo umukurikiyeho cyaba umutungo, ubwiza n’ibindi, ahubwo wagakwiye kubikora kubera urukundo.
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