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Dore amagambo akarishye udakwiye kubwira umukunzi wawe kuko yagusenyera.

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Bibaho kurakaranya n’uwo mwasahakanye cyangwa uwo mukundana ndetse bibaho ko muri kwa kurakara uvuga amagambo atari meza.

Iyo uburakari bushize hashobora kuza gusabana imbabazi, nk’uko intonganya zishobora no kuganisha ku iherezo ry’umubano wanyu.
Kimwe mu byabigiramo uruhare ni amagambo ukoresha, imvugo cyangwa imyitwarire ugaragaza muri ako kanya na nyuma yaho gato.

Ese ni ayahe magambo ukwiye kwirinda kuba wabwira uwo mwashakanye/mukundana kugirango atazana igitotsi gikomeye mu mubano wanyu? Ese ni ayahe magambo, ugiye uyabwirwa kenshi yakwereka ko hari ikibazo mu mibanire yanyu?
Iyi nkuru igiye kukugezaho amwe muri yo ndetse ashobora kubasenyera urukundo rwanyu.

1. Amaherezo tuzatandukana

Gukangisha umuntu ko mwatandukana, niyo waba warakaye cyane si ikintu gikwiye. Niba ubivuze, menya ko igihe cyose iryo jambo rizahora mu ntekerezo z’uwaribwiwe kandi azahorana inkeke n’amakenga mu mubano wanyu ku buryo bishobora gutera izindi mpagarara.

2. Nta na rimwe, buri gihe

Aya magambo abiri akenshi akunze kugaruka umuntu ashaka kwerekana ko uwo bashakanye/bakundana hari inshingano runaka adakora cyangwa ikosa runaka ahoramo. “Nta na rimwe ndabona watetse” (umugabo abwira umugore), ese wowe buri gihe uhora wasinze? (Umugore ku mugabo) n’andi nkayo, ni amagambo wakumva ko ataremereye cyane ariko agaragaza gupfobya no kwerekana ko utanyuzwe ariko birimo gukabya. Icyakora biramutse ariko biri nta kosa ririmo, ni ugucyaha no gucyebura. Ariko niba ari ikintu kibayeho rimwe cyangwa kabiri ugahita ubigira rusange, uri kwisenyera nk’ihene.

3. Ceceka aho!

Iri jambo, kenshi rishobora kuvuganwa uburakari n’ubukana mu kiganiro hagati, ntabwo rikwiye mu bantu bakundana, bashakanye kuko si umwana ucecekesha, ni umuntu mukuru. Mureke avuge nawe uze kuvuga niyo yaba avuga ibitakunyuze, akubeshyera se, kuko iri jambo ubwaryo ryazamura ibibazo byinshi

4. N’ubundi nturi mama.

Nyine si nyoko ariko se kubimwibutsa bivuze iki? Erega ntabwo uwo mwashakanye/mukundana yagera aha nyoko. Ntibishoboka. Uwakubyaye muhuzwa n’amaraso, uwo muhuzwa n’urukundo. Kuba rero akubabaje ukamwereka ko ubizi ko atari nyoko, byerekana ko ahari ubona nyoko amuruta nyamara waramusize/uzamusiga. Rekera aho kuvuga iryo jambo mu kiganiro niyo mwaba mwashwanye.

5. Uri ikigoryi, nta bwenge ugira

Ni gute ariko utinyuka kwita uwo mwashakanye/mukundana ikigoryi, ukavuga ko nta bwenge agira? Ese ko ibisa bisabirana ubwo akubajije niba wowe ubufite, wasubiza iki? Umubyeyi umwe yise umwana we imbwa, umwana na we ati ariko urabizi ni wowe wambyaye. Tekereza mbere yo kuvuga.

6. Sinzi icyatumye tumenyana.

Amagambo nk’aya yo kwicuza niba binakurimo jya uyavugira mu mutima keretse ahari niba koko udashaka gukomezanya na we, kuko niba wicuza icyatumye umenyana na we, bivuze ko nta n’icyo yakora ngo ugishime, ahubwo byose bisigara ari ugucengana no kureba buri wese inyungu ze.

5. Mbabarira, ariko…

Ijambo rya mbere ni ryiza riranakwiye riragaragaza kwicuza. Gusa irikurikiraho, rihita risibanganya irya mbere kuko ugiye kurengera amakosa yawe cyangw kuyagereka ku bandi. Niba wemera ko koko wakosheje wishaka kugerekaho izindi nzitwazo. Kuko kuzana impamvu byerekana kutemera ikosa kuko ubona ko ryakozwe ahubwo uryemeye kuko uryeretswe, iki gihe kurisubira biroroha.

6. Ubundi iki cyana cyawe, …

Niba uwo mwashakanye afite abandi bana mubana batari abawe, si byiza kubazana hagati mu ntonganya zanyu kuko niyo waba utabanga ariko ashobora guhita abibonamo ikindi kintu, no mu gihe uhaniye umwana ikosa ugasanga bibaye ikibazo kubera iryo wavuze. Ibuka ko akarenze umunwa karushya ihamagara

7.Ese usigaye ungana ute?

Niko se, uko angana ucyeka nta ruhare ubifitemo wowe? Yarinze se angana atyo wowe ureba he ku buryo bisigaye ari incyuro mu rugo? Niba waramuhaye igikoma yabyaye kubera konsa abana bawe akabyibuha abizire? Niba umuhoza ku nkeke akaba yarahorose ikibazo ni we cyangwa ni wowe? Iri jambo kurimubwira kenshi si byiza ni ukwangiza umubano.

8. Uyu munsi se noneho nakoze iki ra?

Nubwo yaba ahora akwereka ko wakosheje cyangwa hari ikibi wakoze, kumubwira gutya ni ukumwereka ko wamaze kumenyera ko agufata nk’umunyamakosa igihe cyose. Niba ubeshyerwa ukuri kuzigaragaza ariko se niba koko uzi ko uhora mu makosa, kuvuga gutya byatuma urenganurwa?

9. Birakureba, bikore uko ubyumva.

Amagambo nk’aya yerekana ko umaze kurambirwa ahari, si meza niba wifuza ko umubano ukomeza. Muri macye akore ibye uko abishaka nawe uzakora ibyawe uko ubishaka. Amaherezo se ubwo azaba ayahe koko?

Niba aya magambo n’andi atari meza ajya ava mu kanwa kawe, nyamara ukaba ukiri kumwe na we, aragukunda kandi uhindutse byarushaho kuba byiza. Niba aya magambo uyabwirwa kenshi, hari ikibazo mu mubano wanyu, ni cyo gihe ngo murebe aho bipfira maze urukundo rusagambe.

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