HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Uyu munsi tugiye kurebera hamwe ibimenyetso bishobora kukwereka ko umukobwa cyangwa umugore runaka ashobora kuba agukunda cyane, anakwiyumvamo, Niba bimwe muri ibi bimenyetso utabihaga agaciro guhera uyu munsi utangire ubyiteho kuko bifite byinshi bisobanuye.
1.Arakwigana
Niba ubona umukobwa akunda kwigana uburyo uvuga cyangwa imyitwarire yawe, Impuguke zisobanura ko icyo ari ikimenyetso cyiza cy’uburyo yatwawe nawe.
Urugero nk’iyo akunda kumwenyura nk’uko ubikora cyangwa ugasanga akunda gukoresha ijambo ukunda, icyo gihe biba byerekana ko akwiyumvamo cyane.
2.Ntiyifuza ko ikiganiro mugirana kirangira
Yaba muri kuvugana imbonankubone cyangwa kuri telefone, umukobwa ukwiyumvamo usanga ibiganiro byanyu abyisangamo n’umutima we wose.
Usanga adashobora kukwandikira ijambo rimwe gusa cyangwa ngo azunguze umutwe we gusa yikiriza nk’igihe muvugana. Iteka ryose nawe usanga akubaza nk’ibibazo kugirango ikiganiro cyanyu cyitarangira.
Rachel DeAlto inzobere mu mibanire agira inama abasore n’abagabo ko bagomba kujya bibaza bino bibazo ’’ Ese ajya asubiza ubutumwa bugufi bwawe ? Yitaba telefone yawe iyo umuhamagaye ?.”
Niba asubiza ubutumwa bugufi bwawe akanarenzaho andi magambo ndetse yakwitaba telefone igihe umuhamagaye ugasanga nawe akubaza ibibazo, byerekana ko umubano wanyu umushishikaje ndetse aba ari kugirango muganire igihe kirekire.
3.Incuti ze n’umuryango bose baba bakuzi
Iyo umukobwa akwiyumvamo, ntabwo agira ipfunwe ryo kukwereka inshuti ze. Abakobwa n’abagore muri rusange usanga bakunda kubwira inshuti zabo z’abakobwa buri kimwe.
Urugero usanga nk’iyo umuhamagaye kuri telefone ari kumwe n’inshuti ze akenshi ahita azibwira ko ari wowe mwavuganaga. Ikindi kimenyetso ugomba kwitaho ni igihe umukobwa akunda kugutumira ngo uhure n’inshuti ze.
Ibi byerekana ko agufite mu mishinga y’ubuzima bwe bw’ahazaza. Inzobere mu by’imibanire Bonnie Winston avuga ko iyo umukobwa akwerekanye mu muryango we, ibyo biba ari ikimenyetso cyiza cyerekana ko agukunda kandi ko agushaka mu buzima bwe.
4.Akubwira amagambo meza akwereka uburyo uri ingenzi
Iyo umukobwa akubwira amagambo meza nko kukubwira ko wambaye neza cyangwa agakora ibintu bituma wishima, icyo ni ikimenyetso cyerekana ko akwiyumvamo.
Yaba akumwenyurira, Yaba akakubwira ko imyenda wambaye ikubereye cyangwa ko usa neza, yaba akohereza amafoto ye!!. Inzobere mu by’imibanire DeAlto avuga ko iyo umukobwa agerageza gutuma wishima, haba hari amahirwe menshi ko akwiyumvamo kandi agukunda nubwo yaba atarabikubwira.
5.Iyo yishe gahunda mwahanye arongera akagusaba ko muyisubiramo
Iyo umukobwa akwiyumvamo, iteka ryose aba yifuza kongera kukubona. urugero nk’iyo muhanye gahunda yo gusohokana mugasangira, ariko ntabashe kuyubahiriza, ashaka uburyo bwose azakubonera umwanya mugasubukura gahunda yo gusangira.
Nanone iyo atakwiyumvamo akora buri kimwe cyose ku buryo utekereza ko yakuburiye umwanya kandi ko utagomba kumubangamira.
Adam LoDolce washinze urubuga rwa Love Strategies ndetse akaba ari n’umujyanama ufasha abantu kubaka urukundo rwabo yaravuze ati ’’ iyo umukobwa akwiyumvamo, akubonera umwanya’’.
7.Ukunda kumufata ari kukureba
Iyo wasohotse uri kumwe n’inshuti zawe muri benshi, iyo harimo umukobwa ukunda ni kenshi umufata akureba mugahuza amaso.
Iyo umukobwa akwiyumvamo kandi agukunda, ni kenshi ushobora guhuza amaso nawe akakureba inshuro nyinshi nyamara mu gihe we ashobora no kutamenya ko wamufashe akureba inshuro nyinshi.
Icyo gihe amahirwe menshi ni uko uyu mukobwa azaba akwiyumvamo cyane kandi ashaka kubikwereka.
Mu gihe uzahuza amaso kenshi n’umukobwa ariko agahita ahindukiza umutwe areba ku rundi ruhande, inzobere mu by’imibanire zivuga ko icyo gihe aba akwiyumvamo ariko afite isoni adashaka kubigaragaza.
8.Agerageza uburyo bwose akwereka ko nta mukunzi afite
Iyo umukobwa akwiyumvamo usanga akubwira uburyo yabuze umuhungu muzima bakundana, cyangwa se akaguha ubuhamya bw’ukuntu abandi bahungu bamufashe nabi.
Usanga ari kuguha amakuru yose akwereka uburyo ari wenyine nta mukunzi afite. Icyo gihe nibikubaho uzamenye ko akwiyumvamo ndetse yifuza ko wamubera umukunzi.
Niwumva akubwiye ko akeneye umuntu basohokana mu birori cyangwa uwo bajya gusangira kuburyo aba atari wenyine, icyo gihe aba ari kuguha amahirwe ategereje ko umubwira ngo yego kuko aba yifuza kujyana nawe kuko akwiyumvamo.
Aba afite ubwoba iyo muri kumwe
Rimwe na rimwe ushobora gutekereza ko umukobwa asa nk’aho adashishikajwe n’ibiganiro mugirana ndetse birashoboka ko impamvu ishobora kubitera ari uko agutinya.
Abahungu benshi usanga batazi gutandukanya igihe umukobwa aba yagize isoni n’ubwoba bwo kukuvugisha n’igihe aba adashaka kukuvugisha.
Nubona umukobwa ari kwikora mu maso igihe muri kuganira, cyangwa akikora mu misatsi, akubika umutwe hasi cyangwa agahuza ibiganza bye byombi, icyo gihe uzamenye ko ari ibimenyetso byerekana ko afite ubwoba.
Yaba ari kuvuga amagambo menshi cyangwa nta na make ari kuvuga, icyo gihe uzakore ibishoboka byose utume atuza yumve atekanye igihe azaba ari kumwe nawe.
