HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Bamwe mu bakobwa bagumirwa iyo muganiriye bakubwira ko ari amahitamo yabo ko badashaka umugabo, gusa hari n’abakubwiza ukuri bati ‘njye nabuze umugabo ahubwo uzandangire’.
Igitangaje ni uko umubare munini w’abakobwa Babura abagabo ari abasa neza ku isura, ibizungerezi. Muri iyi nkuru turagaruka ku mpamvu 10 zituma abakobwa b’ibizung
1.Akenshi, Abasore babona badakwiranye
Iyo uri umukobwa mwiza cyane, n’abandi bose baba babizi, ndetse bamwe no
kukurusha ariko aho gukora ibishoboka ngo barebe ko mwakundana, abasore benshi
nta n’uzagerageza gushyiramo imbaraga kugira ngo akubwire iby’urukundo.
Si ukuvuga ko batazi ko uri mwiza, ahubwo ni uko bafata ko uri mwiza
birenze ku buryo bumva utabemerera kuba umukunzi, bagahitamo kubireka ntihagire
uwo muvugana ku rukundo.
2.Akenshi abakobwa beza baragorana cyane
Mu kuri, abakobwa beza cyane ni uruhurirane rw’ibintu byinshi cyane, ibi
bikaba byatuma abasore bumva batabasha guhangana na byo. Ni nko gufata amabara
yose ukayavangitiranya, iyo uyavanze, birangira ahindutse umweru, bikaba ariyo
mpamvu, n’abasore benshi bumva batahangana n’ubu bwiza.
3.Bariyemera
Birashoboka ko utahita ubona umusore mukundana mu gihe waba utagabanije
ibyo wumva ukeneye kuzageraho mu buzima bwawe, ariko ukomeza kwifata ugashaka
kuzabona umukunzi ufite ibyo utekereza nk’umukobwa mwiza.
Nibyo koko uri umukobwa mwiza, ukwiye guhura n’umukunzi uzakugeza ku
nzozi zawe kandi uri mwiza bihagije bituma kuba wagabanya ibyo wumva ushaka
kuzageraho ejo hazaza, byatuma uzabaho nabi, gusa ibyo bivuze ko ugomba
gutegereza umusore ukeneye igihe kirekire.
4.Icyizere bigirira gitera benshi ubwoba
Urumva wuzuye kandi ukaba uzi neza ko uri mwiza by’agatangaza, iyo ugenda
mu nzira, ugenda mu buryo ushatse kuko uba uzi neza ko ntawakuveba kandi ko
bose bazi ko uri mwiza cyane, nta kizatuma wumva ko uri inyuma y’abandi
bakobwa.
Gusa ibyo birahagije gutuma abasore bagutinya ntihagire ukuvugisha ku
rukundo, ni ukuvuga ko wowe ukeneye umusore ugomba guhangana n’umukobwa
wifitiye icyo cyizere cyo ku rwego rwo hejuru, bizatuma umutegereza igihe.
5.Ntibaterwa ikibazo no kuba bonyine
Umukobwa mwiza aba azi kwihagararaho, akagenda akicara akagereka akaguru
ku kandi ategereje umusore ufite ibyo akeneye ko azaza amwizaniye. Ni byiza
ariko ugomba kuzamara icyo gihe umutegereje wiyitaho n’ubwo aba ari ukuba
wenyine, ariko n’ubundi bituma umara igihe utari kureba uko wahitamo umusore
ukunogeye.
Nta kibazo ibyo biteye kuko uri mwiza, uzabona umusore yizanye aje
kugushaka, ariko bishobora gufata igihe kirekire kugira ngo ubone umukunzi
mukundana by’ukuri.
6.Baba bazi icyo bakeneye
Mu by’ukuri abakobwa beza baba bazi ibyo bakora kugira babone umugabo
uzabageza ku byiza bifuza haba mu rukundo cyangwa mu buzima busanzwe. Ushobora gutekereza ngo iki kintu kizamfasha kubona umusore ukunda
by’ukuri, ariko ushobora no gusanga uri ukwisibira amayira. Ntugomba kugabanya
ibyo wifuza kuzageraho mu buzima bwawe, ariko geregeza ufungure amaso gake.
7.Bakurura abantu batari bo
Niba uri umukobwa mwiza, abantu benshi baba babizi ko uri mwiza cyane.Ikintu kidashimishije gato, ni uko hari abantu bamwe bataba barangajwe imbere
n’ubwo buranga bwawe, mu gihe ushobora kubona abasore beza bagutereta, ni na ko
haza n’abo ubona mutari ku rugero rumwe, bikaba imvange. Uba ushobora kumara igihe uri gushukwa n’abo mutari ku rugero rumwe kandi
badafite gahunda, ukabimenya hashize igihe kirekire amazi yararenze inkombe.
8.Abakobwa beza bagira kwihangana kurenze ugukenewe
Igihe ubonye uwo mukundana, uburyo mubabarirana amakosa mu rukundo, nibyo
bigaragaza igihe muzamarana mukundanye. Ukwihangana kwawe, ni byo bituma uba
inshuti nziza kandi n’umuntu mwiza ushimisha mu rukundo, gusa bishobora
kurangira umaze igihe kirekire uri mu byo utumva neza kandi bidafite intego.
Birashoboka ko wakwisanga ahantu umukunzi wawe akoze ikosa, ukamubabarira
bwa mbere, ubwa kabiri, ubwa gatatu, yewe n’ubwa kane. Urabizi neza ko abantu
bakora amakosa, gusa ikibazo kiza, iyo uri kubabarira umusore utisubiraho, ibi
bigatuma umara igihe kirekire nta mukunzi ufite kandi wari kuba warabonye
umusore mwiza kandi wisubiraho mu gihe akosheje.
9.Buri gihe abakobwa biyiziho ubwiza baba bahuze
Ntabwo uri ba bakobwa birirwa bicaye mu rugo ngo bategereje abasore
bazaza kubashaka, uba uri mu mirimo, wagiye gukina, gusura abantu mu miryango,
gufasha abantu akazi. Gahunda zawe z’icyumweru ziba zipanze neza kandi nta gihe
cyo gupfa ubusa kirimo, kuko hose hapangiye imirimo, ibi bigatuma utabona
umwanya wo gusohoka ngo utembere, uhure n’abasore muganire.
Impamvu uba utaboneka cyane, ni uko igihe cyose uba ufite ibyo uri
gukora, ibi bikaba bishobora kugukomerera kubona uburyo wakongera umuntu mu
buzima bwawe, uzakenera guha umwanya muri za gahunda uba wapanze.
10.Batekereza kubona nk’uko batanga
Uritonda mu buzima bwawe, ariko ntabwo buri muntu wese aba yumva
yagukunda wese nk’uko nawe umukunda. Mu gihe uwo ukunda yumva ari urukundo rwo
kwishimisha, wowe wabifashe nk’aho mugomba gukundana nk’abazabana nk’umugore n’umugabo, ni uko nawe ukumva ko ariko yagakwiye kugukunda.
