HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Hari ingeso zimwe na zimwe abagore bagira nyuma yo kurongorwa zigatuma abagabo babo bahorana agahinda. Kenshi iyo umugore atikosoye birangira umugabo we atakimufitiye urukundo nka mbere ndetse bikanagera ku kigero cyo kuba umuryango wacikamo kabiri mu gihe atisubiyeho ngo azireke. Izo ngeso ni izi zikurikira:
1.Gufuhira umugabo bikabije
Abagabo benshi usanga binubira ukuntu abagore babo batabagirira icyizere bagahora babakeka ko bafitanye ubucuti n’abandi bagore. Ku bijyanye n’amafaranga, abagore bamwe bafuha usanga bagenzura uko abagabo bakoresha amafaranga kubera ko baba bakeka ko bayakoresha mu kwita ku miryango yabo gusa, gutereta abandi bagore, mu rusimbi cyangwa se mu kugurira agatama bagenzi babo cyane cyane ab’igitsina gore. Nubwo abagabo baba badafata kuri ka rufuro cyangwa ibindi bisindisha ntibibuza abagore babo guhora bahangayitse babakekera ubusa ari nabyo bibuza amahoro abagabo bamwe bakumva kuba mu ngo zabo ari nko buba muri gereza.
2.Gukundwakaza abagize imiryango yabo gusa
Nubwo nta bushakashatsi burakorwa, ubusesenguzi n’ibiganiro n’abagabo byerekana ko abagore bishimira ko bene wabo baba mu muryango kuruta uko bashyigikira kubana na bene wabo w’abagabo babo. N’iyo babanye usanga bagirana amakimbiranecyangwa se bakabana bya mbuze uko ngira barebana ay’ingwe.
Kenshi usanga abagore bakora ikosa rikomeye cyane ryo kwihugiraho no gutonesha bene wabo ku buryo hari abafata umushahara n’ibindi umuryango winjiza bakabikoresha bita ku miryango yabo batitaye ko umugabo nawe afite umuryango cyangwa se nabo ubwabo bafite imiryango bagomba gufataniriza hamwe n’abagabo kwitaho.
Igitangaje gusa ni uko ibi babikora banerekana ko ngo bakunda abagabo babo!
Uku gukunda imiryango yabo kurusha iy’abagabo byerekana ko bene aba bagore nta rukundo namba baba bafitiye abagabo babo kuko ntibyumvikana ukuntu waba udaha agaciro kamwe umuryango w’umugabo wawe bityo ngo uvuge ko umukunda.
3.Kugira umwanda ndetse n’akavuyo
Nubwo bizwi ko abagore benshi baha agaciro ubwiza ndetse bagakunda isuku no gushyira ibintu ku mirongo, hari bamwe mu bagore bamara gushyingirwa nyuma yo kubyara bagahita bumva ko nta mpamvu yo gukomeza kwiyitaho no kwita ku isuku y’umuryango. Umutima wose n’urukundo bakabyerekeza ku bana gusa bakiyibagiza ko bafite n’indi nshingano yo gukunda n’abagabo babo. Abateye gutyo usanga batanashaka gukomeza kureshya abagabo babo ahubwo ibikorwa byabo byose bikaba ibyo kubarisha umutima no kubatesha agaciro. Muri uko kutiyitaho no kuremerera abagabo babo kubera umwanda no kudashyira ibintu ku murongo biha urwaho abakozi b’abakobwa mu ngo zo gutangira kwikoresha udukorwa rw’urukundo kugira ngo bareshye abagabo cyangwa se abagira barumuna babo nabo bakaba babaca inyuma.
Iyo bitabaye ibyo, abagabo batangira kwishakira abandi b’igitsina gore bo kubafata neza.
Abagore bakwiye kumenya ko kuvuka k’umwana kutavanaho umushyikirano n’urukundo hagati n’umugabo. Ni ngombwa rero ko abagore bakomeza kwiyitaho yaba mu isuku y’umubiri, isuku y’imyambaro ndetse kandi bagakora ibishoboka byose mu ngo zabo hakagaragara isuku na gahunda.
4.Kugira inshuti cyangwa abajyanama b’abagore bagenzi be babi
Zimwe mu mpamvu zituma abagore batumvikana n’abagabo babo zikomoka ku kugira inshuti mbi zibagira inama. Impuguke mu by’imyitwarire zivuga ko abagore muri bo bafite kamere ishukika vuba bityo ngo kubemeza ikintu bikoroha ku buryo bahita bakira bwangu inama mbi bavanye kuri bagenzi babo. Ibi kandi bigaragazwa n’uko usanga mu myambarire ndetse n’imideri yabo bigana bagenzi babo runaka batanazi impamvu runaka ituma bagenzi babo bambara cyangwa bitwara gutyo.
Akenshi ikigaragaza ko umugore yatangiye kugibwa mu matwi ni uko ibikorwa n’imyitwarire ye bihinduka ugasanga umushyikirano hagati ye n’umugabo uzamo agatotsi. Iyo umugore ataretse izo nshuti cyangwa abajyanama babi, nta kabuza bituma umugabo amwishisha ndetse agatangira kumuca inyuma. Ni byiza ko umugore agira ubushishozi mu gutoranya inshuti areba iz’inyangamugayo kandi zimuhesha agaciro ndetse zikanamwungura inama zatuma abana neza n’umuryango we.
