HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Ni kenshi usanga umuntu yakunze undi ariko akabura aho abihera abimubwira cyangwa yabimubwira bakamukurizaho bimwe ab’ubu bita “gutera indobo”. Burya umuntu aterwa indobo kubera uburyo yitwaye atereta, iyo umukobwa nta gahunda agufiteho ubimenya mbere y’uko umubwira ijambo ndagukunda.
N’ubwo hari usaba umuntu urukundo agahita arumwemerera atamugoye bitewe n’uwo ariwe, burya akenshi ushobora guterwa akadobo bitewe n’uko wagiye nabi cyangwa se wabihubukiye nyamara iyo witwara neza byashoboraga gucamo ukamwemeza.
Dore ibyagufasha kwitwara neza igihe ugiye gutereta umukobwa uwo ariwe wese ntabashe kukwigobotora atavuze YEGO.
1. Kubanza kumenyana n’uwo wifuzaho urukundo
Bijya bibaho ko umuntu ahura n’undi agahita amukunda, nyamara n’ubwo byabaho kwitonda biba ari ngombwa kugirango umenye uwo wakunze uwo ariwe, imico n’ibyiyumviro bye, amateka ye ndetse ukaba wanamenya niba nta wundi afite bakundana. Ibi rero nta handi uzabikura uretse kujya umuba hafi mukaganira, ukamwereka ko umwitayeho kandi umuhaye umwanya bityo akakwisanzuraho ukagenda umenye ukuri kumwerekeyeho buhoro buhoro.
2. Kwirinda guhita umusaba urukundo mu magambo
Ni kenshi usanga abantu batekereza ko intambwe ya mbere mu gukundana n’umuntu ari uguhita ubimubwira mu magambo, nyamara ahubwo burya iyo ikwiye kuba iya nyuma y’izindi, mbese ukabimubwira wizeye neza ko akubwira “YEGO”.
Ibi bivuga rero ko ugomba kwitonda, ukereka uwo wakunze ko umukunda mu bikorwa, mu buryo umufata, mu kumuha umwanya no kumwereka ko umwishimiye bityo buhoro buhoro nawe ugenda ubona icyo wa muntu agutekerezaho, kuburyo iyo nawe agukunze ubibona mbese mukabanza gukundana mu bikorwa ya magambo akazaza nyuma.
3. Kwirinda kumwereka ko umufuhira cyangwa se umuyobora
Ibi bikunze kubaho cyane ugasanga umuntu arafuhira undi batari banemeranya urukundo. Ibi ntibivuga ko wakwikuramo ibyo byiyumviro kuko nyine byizana, ahubwo ugomba kugerageza kubyibikamo ntubimwereke. Naguha gahunda akayica wimurakarira ngo ubimwereke, numuhamagara ntafate telephone wimutonganya ngo umwereke uburakari. Irinde mbese kumwereka ko adafite ubwisanzure bwo kwitwara uko ashaka ahubwo agomba kwitwara uko wowe ushaka. Ibi byakuviramo kurya akadobo kandi wenda amaherezo wa muntu mwari kuzakundana rugakomera.
4. Wimubera nk’umutwaro ngo umuzitire
Burya iyo abantu bakundana, biba byoroshye kuba umwe yabwira undi ngo byanze bikunze uyu munsi tubonane cyangwa byanze bikuze ejo tuzajyana aha naha n’ibindi nk’ibyo. Uwo wifuzaho urukundo rero mu gihe mutari mwabyerura rwose uramenye utazamushyiraho igitutu ugashaka ko ibyo umwifuzaho byose bigomba kugenda uko ubishaka. Ahubwo wowe muhe ubwisanzure busesuye, icyo umukeneyeho ukimusabe uciye bugufi naho bitari ibyo uzarya akadobo byihuse!
5.Kwirinda kuvuga amagambo menshi adasobanutse
Burya abakobwa bakunda abahungu bazi gusetsa ariko na none ntibakunda umuhungu uvugagura amagambo menshi, umuhungu uvuga adaha abandi umwanya wo kuvuga abakobwa ntibamukunda, niba uri kumwe n’umukobwa wifuzaho ubunshuti gerageza umuhe umwanya w’ijambo kandi wirinde kumuca mu ijambo ahubwo ugerageze umutege amatwi. Musore ujye wirinda kuvuga menshi cyane kugira ngo wegukane uwo wakunze. Kora ibikorwa byinshi bimwereka ko umukunda ugire amagambo macye.
