Mu buzima bw’urukundo no mu ngo, hari ikibazo gikunze kubaho: abagore benshi bagorwa no kwakira ubufasha, n’ubwo baba barushye cyangwa bafite ibintu byinshi
byo gukora. Ibi byigaragaza mu bikorwa bya buri munsi, rimwe na rimwe bikaba byatera umwuka mubi mu mibanire.
Urugero rwa Sarah na John
Sarah na John ni umugabo n’umugore basanze bafite ikibazo cyo gusobanukirwa neza uburyo bwo gufashanya. Sarah yagaragazaga ko akunda gukora ibintu byose
ku giti cye, agatanga byinshi kurusha uko yakira. Iyo John yageragezaga kumufasha, Sarah yaramusubizaga ati: “Ndabyishoboreye.” Igihe yamufashaga, Sarah
yanengaga uburyo yabikoze cyangwa uko yabitinzeho, bituma acika intege ku buryo atashakaga kongera kumufasha. Nyuma yaho Sarah aza kujya amushinja ko
atamufasha.
Ibi byatumaga John yumva atumvwa, akababazwa no kutamenya uko yakomeza kumuba hafi. Sarah, ku rundi ruhande, yumvaga ananiwe kandi atitaweho, kuko
atashoboraga kwakira ubufasha abashije guhabwa n’umugabo we.
Mu biganiro byabo n’umujyanama w’imibanire, byagaragaye ko Sarah yagiraga imyumvire idafite aho ishingiye yo kumva ko kugira ngo abe afite agaciro, agomba
gukora byose wenyine. Yakangaga kwakira ubufasha kuko yabifataga nk’ikimenyetso cy’ubumuga cyangwa intege nke nkuko tubikesha Justine Baruch.com.
Gukomeza ibiganiro byafashije Sarah gusobanukirwa ko kwakira atari intege nke, ahubwo ari igice cy’ingenzi cy’urukundo rwuzuye. John we yize uko yarema
kumufasha, amushishikariza gusangira amarangamutima no kumva ko kuba yamufasha ntakibazo kirimo.
Impamvu abagore bagorwa no gufashwa harimo kumva ko badakwiriye gufashwa aho benshi bagira iyo myumvire ku buryo badashobora kwakira impano, ishimwe cyangwa
ubufasha.Iyo umuntu ahawe ikintu, hari ubwo yumva agomba kukishyura, bikamubera umutwaro. Ikindi iyo umugore afite stress, akenshi arushaho gukora byinshi
aho gufata akaruhuko, bigatuma adashobora kwakira ubufasha.
Urugero: Umugore ashobora kumva ko kuba umugabo amuguriye ibyo kunywa bisaba ko amuha nimero ye cyangwa undi mwenda. Ibi bimutera gusubiza inyuma ubufasha
mu rwego rwo kwirinda.
Hari uburyo bw’inshi abagabo bashobora gufasha burimo, guhumuriza umugore ko ibyo umuha bitagamije gusaba ikindi gisubizo cyangwa inyungu runaka.
Kumubwira ko gufashwa bidakuraho imbaraga ze cyangwa ubushobozi bwe. Kumuha akanya ko kuruhuka – urugero nko gushaka umusimbura mu mirimo nawe agafata
akaruhuko.
Abagabo n’abagore baratandukanye mu buryo bwo guhangana n’umunaniro. Abagabo bararuhuka, abagore bagakunda ku guma mu mirimo. Umugabo ashobora kumufasha
kumenya ibimubabaje, kumutera inkunga yo gufata akaruhuko, cyangwa kumusimbura mu mirimo yo mu rugo.
Iyo abagore bigishijwe kwakira, bararuhuka, bagakomeza kugira urukundo n’urugwiro. Ibi bigira ingaruka nziza ku mubano wabo, bikubaka icyizere, urukundo
n’ubusabane haba mu rugo no mukazi.
