HARAGIRIMANA Dieudonne
Ushobora gutekereza ko ubirambyemo cyangwa ntacyo umuntu ya kubeshya ku bijyanye n’amabanga yo mu buriri ariko burya ngo utazi ubwenge ashima ubwe kandi ngo akanyoni katagurutse ntikamenya iyo bweze.
Ibijyanye no gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina bisaba guhora wiyungura ubumenyi buri munsi hato ngo igikorwa cyagushimishaga kitazasigara kikururira.
Mu nkuru y’urubuga elcrema berekana ko nubwo imibonano mpuzabitsina igirwamo uruhare n’umugabo n’umugore ariko biba byiza iyo hari amabanga umugore yamenye yatuma icyo gikorwa kigenda neza.
Amwe muri ayo mabanga umugore agomba kuba azi harimo:
1. Umugabo aba afite icyoba mu buriri
Umugabo burya uko yaba ameze kose aba afite icyoba cyangwa guhuzagurika mu buriri yibaza niba ari bubashe gushimisha umugore bari kumwe.
Ibanga ugomba kumenya nk’umugore, ni ukumufasha igikorwa mwese mukakigiramo uruhare ntumutererane kuko amaherezo ubihirwa nawe.
Umugabo utabashije gushimisha umugore mu buriri arababara, bikamutera ipfunwe akaba yajya no kwihisha igihe amubonye, ni byiza ko rero wajya umufasha bikagenda neza.
2. Umugabo aba ashaka ko umubwira uko igikorwa kirimo kugenda
Buri mugabo mu buriri aba ashaka kuba igihangange, aba ashaka gushikmisha umugore kurenza undi muntu uwo ariwe wese bahuye mbere ye.
Mu gihe rero cyo gutera akabariro, aba yiteze ko wowe mugore umubwira ukanamushimira uko igikorwa kirimo kugenda kugira ngo arusheho kugira akanyabugabo no gukora neza kurenzaho.
3. Bwira umugabo wawe ko ateye neza ukimubona
Abagabo bashobora kugira ipfunwe ry’imiterere yabo y’umubiri cyangwa ibiro byinshi cyangwa bike, uburebure cyangwa ubugufi, uburyo ateye inyuma (physical appareance) n’ibindi, iyo rero afite ipfunwe ashobora kudakora neza igikorwa cyo gutera akabariro.
Ni byiza ko wowe mugore umutinyura ukamwereka ko ateye mu buryo wowe ukunda ibyo bimufasha kuzuza inshingano ze neza mu buriri.
4. Kutamuca inyuma
Umugabo wese yanga byimazeyo, umugore umuca inyuma niyo we yaba abikora.
Iyo rero umugabo wawe aziko umuca inyuma bimutera umutima mubi, igikorwa cyo gutera akabariro nta gikore mu buryo nawe bugushimisha bigasa no kurangiza umuhango.
Umugore wese agomba kumenya ko kugira ngo imibonano mpuzabitsina igende neza ari uko agomba kuba adaca inyuma umugabo we yaba anabikora umugabo we ntabimenye kuko nibwo bose babasha gushimishanya ntawe ucyeka undi amababa.
