Nyirasusuruka Mariam
Mu by’ukuri iyo urebye impande n’impande uhasanga abakobwa beza (basa neza banateye neza urebeye inyuma (Physical appearance)), bamwe muri bo babifata nk’umugisha bagize bakanashimira Imana yabaremye basa neza nkuko babyifuza bakaba abantu b’ibitangaza muri sosiyete bahiga abandi mu bwiza. Gusa ni ibintu bigaragararira abantu bose ko abagore beza bakunze kubura abagabo
Bimaze kumenyerwa ko abagabo bakundana n’abagore beza bagakunda gusohokana, gutembereana, bagasura inshuti bari kumwe ariko ugasanga umubano wabo ushingiye kugirana ibihe byiza gusa ntibabe babarongora ngo babe ba mama wabana babo
Ushobora kwemeranya nanjye cyangwa ntitwemeranye ariko nzi neza ko waba warabonye umusore cyangwa umugabo wakundanye n’umukobwa mwiza igihe kirekire, umukobwa akizerako ariwe bazabana, ariko ku buryo butunguranye umukobwa wa musore bari bamaze igihe bakundana ashakanye nundi kandi utari mwiza nkawe (ku isura no mu miterere igaragara inyuma).
Ibi bikunda gusigira ibikomere byinshi abakobwa, abandi bagahitamo kuzibukira kubaho bakabaho ntanshuti, abandi bakaguma gukunda bakabifata nkaho nta bukwe bukibaho.
Ubushakashatsi bwerekana ko abagabo cyangwa abasore bahitamo gukundana n’abakobwa beza cyane igihe kinini bakabakoza icyo bashaka cyose ariko nyuma bakabata bakishakira abandi. Binavugwa ko iyi myumvire itari ku bagabo gusa kuko n’abakobwa beza cyane bazi kandi bizera ko abagore beza bakunda kubata bakajya kubana n’abandi.
Iyo bije ku mubano w’abasore n’inkumi, akenshi umukobwa ashaka umusore mwiza ushinguuye kandi ukurura abakobwa . Umukobwa iyo mukunda kugirana amakimbirane haba muvugana cyangwa mu butumwa bugufi, mu busanzwe bigargarira abakobwa ko muri mu kuryoshya gusa ariko ntibizera ko muzigera mubana aho abakobwa bavugako iyo mukundanye igihe kinini ari ukuryoshya gusa mu gihe bo baba bashaka abo babana, bakarambirwa bagatandukana nabo bakundana bagahitamo kwigendera bagashaka ababakunda bakabafasha.
Iyi myitwarire ntabwo abakobwa bakunda kuyakira kubera ko abasore usanga babifata ukundi, abagabo bemera ko aribo bagomba kuba aba mbere mu gufasha abagore ariko abagore bafata iyambere mu gufasha abagabo, bikaba bibi cyane iyo umukobwa ari mwiza cyane abandi bamufata nkaho azajya yifuzwa n’abandi bagabo.
Kugira ngo wumve ibintu neza abagore bagaragara kandi bateye neza ntabwo ariko baba bari, mu busanzwe umugabo uwari we wese, aba yabakunda ariko iyo ubegereye ukabamenya neza usanga ari agahinda gusa bagatinya kubana nabo, yamara gugasobanukirwa ko ubwiza babuvanye mu mavuta n’imyambaro bambara atari ubwiza nyakuri, akenshi ubwiza bagaragaza ko burahenze, abagabo benshi badafite umutungo ufatika barabatinya bagahitamo kudakundana nabo bagahita bigendera batinya ko bazabakenesha , nubwo ubwoba baba bafite rimwe na rimwe buba budafite ishingiro.
Bivugwa ko abagore beza bashora menshi kugira ngo base neza kandi bakabikora ashaka guhisha aho batari beza, abagabo benshi bakundanye nabo nyuma bakabata babajijwe impamvu bavuzeko kugendana nabo, kubabona, gukorana imibonano mpuzabitsina bumva bameze neza cyane iyo bari kubonwa nabagenzi babo, ariko kubana nabo nk’umugore n’umugabo bumva badatekekanye, bagatanga ingero bati, “Niba umugore wawe umugabo ufite amafaranga amwifuje mwabana igihe kingana gute? Wahora wishimanye nawe? Nzabasha kumutunga?” Ababajijwe bose bavuze ko abagore beza bahenda udafite amafaranga utabasha kumutunga.
Abagore beza nabo bizerako abagabo bake batunze aba bagore bavugako bakoresha amafaranga menshi cyane , kuko bene abo bagore bakenera impano, gusohokera ahantu hahenze, impano zihenze, niba ushaka kumutungura ukabikora ubatungurisha impano zihenze bisaba kwikora ku ikofi ngo uhore umunezeza.
Niba ushaka ko mujyana gufata ifunguro ugomba kumujyana ahantu hahenze kandi hahurirwa nabantu benshi kandi ukamubaza aho yifuza kujya akihitiramo, ugasanga ibyo ubazwa birahenze, bagasobanura ko abasore iyo bakundanye naba bakobwa beza bisa no gutakaza amafaranga bigatuma bacika intege gukangana cyangwa ngo babane nabo.
Abandi basobanura ko abagore beza baba bashaka umwana umwe cyangwa babairi kugira ngo batazataka imiterere yabo mu gihe abagabo bo baba bashaka abana berenze babiri, binavugwa ko abagore beza ubumenyi bwabo mu guteka ari bucye
Utitaye no kuri ibi, mukuri usanga abagabo badakunda kubana n’abakobwa bazwi cyane, usanga abasore nta nyota bafitiye abantu bazwi, bakurura abagabo benshi, iyo abasore bashaka abagore bo kurushinga bareba imyitwarire hamwe n’ibindi bitagaragarira inyuma aribyo akundindira uwo mukobwa.
Inkuru yanditswe na Dr. Chris Mauki kuri Bongo5 ivuga ko akenshi usanga abagabo badakururwa n’abagore bashaka kurebwa igihe cyose, bashaka kumenyekana cyane iyo bari mu bantu benshi, icyo abagabo baba bashaka n’umugore uba wishimye mu rugo , wumva, wajya inama n’uwo bashakanye, washobora guha uburere bwiza abo azabyara, agashimisha abana be n’umuryango we atari uhora yita ku ngoyi n’inzara ze.
Ujya utungurwa nuko abantu babana n’ubumuga bashyingira buri munsi, bagashyingiranywa n’abakobwa beza, kuki udashyingirwa? N’ubwo bashyingirwa buri munsi, urukundo rugomba kuvomerewa, byaba none cyangwa ejo, adadshyingiwe none bazashyingirwa ejo cyangwa batandukane ejo bongere bashyingirwe
Ucyeka ko abagabo bashyingiranywa n’abagore batazi icyo bashaka, uzatungurwa nubwo ntacyo atakubwira ko azakurongora, nubwo yiteguye gukundana nawe, ntimuzabana,
Inama ku bakobwa bagenzi banjye muhindure imyitwarire, imbaraga mukoresha muconga inzara n’ingoyi muzikoreshe muhindura imico n’imyitwarire
