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Ibintu 5 utagomba gukora nyuma yo gutandukana n’umukunzi wawe

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Gutandukana bishobora kuba byiza cyangwa bibi bitewe n’impamvu yatumye mutandukana. Abantu babiri bafite imibanire myiza bemerenyijeho mbere yo gukundana bashobora gutandukana igihe babona ibyo bari bateze kubona cyangwa kugeraho ataribyo bari kubona.

Ariko rero buri gihe ntabwo abantu batandukana babyemeranyijeho iyo batandukanye nabi umwe ashobora guhungabana cyangwa bombi bagahungabana.
Iki gihe ntabwo biba byoroshye gutandukana nuwo wakundaga gusa niba waratandukanye n’umukunzi wawe hari inama ugirwa:

1.Ntukirenganye ngo wumve ko ari wowe munyamakosa

Aha niho ihungabana ritangirira ku bantu benshi nyuma gutandukana nabi n’umukunzi wawe. Aho kugira ngo bigire ku mubano mwiza bagiranye, bagenda bicuza uburyo batandukanye. Ibi ntabwo aribyo, nubwo waba warakoze ikintu gikomeye cyane bigatuma utandutandukana n’umukunzi wawe kwigaya ntacyo bizahindura kubyabaye.

Ikintu ushobora gukora ni ukwigira ku makosa yawe igihe cyagera ukongera gukunda ukirinda kuba wakongera kuyasubiramo bikagufasha kubana neza n’umukunzi wawe mushya. Nutabikora gutyo uzaheranwa n’agahinda umere nk’imfungwa mu bitekerezo byawe mu gihe uwo mwatandukanye yishimye kandi yatangiye ubuzima bushya.

2.Ntukajye ahantu uri wenyine

Ni ibintu bisanzwe ko umuntu watandukanye nabi n’umukunzi we amara igihe kinini ari wenyine kubera umubabaro n’agahinda aho kugira ngo ave mu kababaro no kwikuramo ibyamukomerekeje umutima ubundi ubuzima buakomeza.

Agahinda ntikazigera na rimwe kagira icyo gahindura ku byabaye ahubwo bizarushaho kuba bibi. Kuba wenyine no kwirinda kujya ahantu hari abantu benshi kubera ko watandukanye n’umukunzi wawe nta cyiza bizakuzanira ahubwo bizakujyana kure y’ibyishimo.

Nyuma yo gutandukana nabi nuwo wakundaga ikizagufasha ni ukuba hamwe n’abantu benshi, inshuti zawe, umuryango no gusohokera kure yaho utuye ubonye ayo mahirwe nukora ibyo uzagenda wibagirwa buhoro buhoro ibyakubabaje umutima. Kenshi uzumva ushaka kuba uri wenyine ariko uzabirwanye cyane ubundi urebe ukuntu wibagirwa ibyo waciyemo bikagukomeretsa umutima.
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3.Kwirinda gukururana nuwo mwatandukanye

Hari impamvu yatumye utandukana nuwo mwakundanaga kuko utari ukimufitiye umumaro nka mbere. Uko byaba byaragenze kose nta mpamvu yo gusubira kumutakambira ngo musubirane kuko niyo yabyemera ntazagufata nkuko yagufataga mbere ntazakubaha nkuko bikwiye.

Nta mpamvu rero yo kugira ngo umuntu agusuzugure nubwo wakumva hari icyo wakoze mugatandukana iyo aba akigukeneye ntiyari gutuma mutandukana. Kuba uri wenyine warigeze kugira umukunzi birababaza kandi biragora ariko biruta kuba waba uri kumwe n’umuntu utaguha agaciro. Tangira ubuzima bushya uzongera ubone urundi rukundo rushobora no kuba rwiza kuruta urwa mbere.

4.Wikwihutira guhita ushaka undi mukunzi

Byagaragajwe ko kwihutira guhita ukunda ntabwo biba byiza. Biterwa nuko umuntu aba yihutiye guhita akunda ataragenzura neza uwo bagiye gukundana.

Nkuko igitangazamakuru elcrema kibivuga ikintu kibi cyo gutandukana nabi n’umukunzi nuko wumva buri gihe uri wenyine, ibyo bituma wihutira kwakira uje agusanga wese cyane cyane iyo yakubaye hafi kurusha abandi mu gihe cy’akababaro.

Gusa ukwiriye kwirinda guhita usubira mu rukundo kuko muri wowe uba utarakira ibyakubayeho no mu mutwe utarahategura kwakira undi mukunzi. Ukeneye igihe cyo gusubiza ibitekerezo ku murongo kugira ngo wongere wihe intego ugenderaho mu rukundo no kuba wahitamo neza igihe wumva ari ngombwa kongera kugira umukunzi. Si byiza kwirukira kongera gukunda ahubwo ihe igihe ubanze utuze ubone kongera gushaka umukunzi.

5.Wihita ufata icyemezo cyo kutazongera gukunda ukundi

Niba urukundo wari urimo bitaragenze neza nkuko wabyifuzaga ntibivuize ko ariko bizagenda niwongera gukunda. Umenye ko umuntu wese ubona urukundo rw’ukuri ashobora kuba yarabanje guhitamo nabi inshuro imwe cyangwa ebyiri. Ni kimwe mu bitugize nk’abantu.

Buri wese agiye ahita areka gukunda kuko ku nshuro ya mbere byagenze nabi nta bantu bishimye kubera urukundo baba bariho uyu munsi.

Icy’ingenzi ni ugukomeza ubuzima nkuko bisanzwe ukagira icyizere cyo kubona ibyiza. Ni ngombwa kandi kwitonda no kugenzura neza igihe ugiye guhitamo uwo muzabana kuko bishobora ku kugiraho ingaruka mbi cyangwa nziza bitewe nuwo wahisemo.

Mu rukundo ntabwo igihe cyose gahunda zanyu zigenda neza nkuko mwabiteganyije cyangwa mu bishaka rimwe na rimwe haboneka ibyo mutumvikanaho bikaba byatuma mutandukana gusa iryo siryo herezo ry’urukundo rwawe ahubwo ugomba gufata umwanya ugatuza igihe kiragera ukabona undi mu kishima mu rukundo rwanyu.

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