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Dore ibimenyetso 6 by’ibanze bizakwereka ko umukobwa agukunda bizira uburyarya..

Urukundo ni urusobe, rukaba n’amayobera uko umuntu agenda arugiraho ubumenyi bunyuranye,agenda amenya aho biva n’aho bigana,icyo yakora n’ibyo agomba kwirinda. Abahungu benshi bakunze kwibaza ibimenyetso biranga umukobwa ugukunda by’ukuri utakuryarya,Niba nawe wajyaga wibaza iki kibazo,iyi nkuru ni wowe igenewe.

Nk’uko tubikesha urubuga Psychology Today ngo burya abakobwa baratandukanye mu miterere,imitekerereze,imigendere(uko bifata),..Uko batandukanye rero ngo ni na ko badakunda kimwe. Ariko byanze bikunze ngo hari aho bahurira ku mikundire yabo no mu buryo bagaragazamo amarangamutima.

Tugiye kureba bimwe mu bimenyetso bahuriraho,umusore ashobora kwitegereza akamenyeraho ko umukobwa umukunda by’ukuri. 

1. Umukobwa agukunda uko uri.

Burya ngo umukobwa utagukunda urukundo nyarukundo,aba afite ikintu runaka agakurikiyeho;Haba umutungo, amafaranga menshi uhembwa cyangwa winjiza,imibereho myiza ufite, umuryango wifashije cyangwa ukize,…Umukobwa ugunda by’ukuri agukundira uko uri mbese ntiyita Ku byowe utunze.Ushobora kwibaza uti ese,mfite urwego rwiza rw’ubuzima ndiho kugeza ubu,nabwirwa n’iki unkunda atankundiye ibyo mfite ? Ni ikibazo cyiza ariko kiroroshye kukibonera umuti. Kugira ngo umenye neza ikimugenza,bisaba igihe gihagije no kumwiga birambuye. Uko mugenda mumarana igihe, ninako ugenda ubona mu byukuri icyo agamije n’icyo agukurikiyeho.Ashobora kukwishushanyaho ukwezi kumwe ariko nimumarana igihe gihagije nk’umwaka uzashyira ubone uruhande ahagazemo.

2. Umukobwa ugukunda ntagusaba ibya mirenge udatunze.

Iyi ngingo yuzuzanya niya mbere. Umukobwa ugukunda ntaguhoza ku nkeke agutura ibibazo ,n’ibyo udashoboye akabikwikoreza. Kutabera umusore bakundana umutwaro,ni ikimenyetso wagenderaho ukamenya niba umukobwa ugukunda by’ukuri.

3. Umukobwa ugukunda aragukebura.

Mu Kinyarwanda baca umugani ngo “nta mugabo wigira” kandi ngo “ntamugabo umwe”. Abasore bagira ingeso zimwe na zimwe zitari nziza. Hari izo umusore aba yaravukanye ari kamere ye cyangwa izo agenda yigira kuri bagenzi be.Umukobwa ugukunda by’ukuri agerageza kugukebura aho abona bitagenda neza ndetse akakugira inama. 

4. Umukobwa ugukunda agushyira muri gahunda ze z’ejo hazaza.

Mwene uyu mukobwa ahora yihatira gukora ibikorwa bibafitiye mwembi ejo hazaza akamaro. Niyo ntacyo murageraho, wumva mu nzozi ze harimo kuzabana na we ubuzima bwe bwose. Nubwo mutarabana ariko atangira kukugufata nk’umutware we.

5. Umukobwa ugukunda ,biragorana ko muryamana.

Nubwo muri iki gihe urubyiruko rwagize gukora imibonano mpuzabitsina nk’umukino, umukobwa ugukunda byukuri biragorana ko akwemerera ko muryamana. Yego hari ababanza kwijijisha ngo bakwereke ko batigeze basambana ariko ahanini umukobwa ugukunda by’ukuri icyo abikorera ni uko aba yumva kuryamana byatuma hagira igihinduka mu hazaza hanyu nk’uko twabibonye mu ngingo ibanza. Iteka kuri we aba yifuza ko wazamubere umutware.

6. Umukobwa ugukunda akwisanzuraho kugeza ubwo akubwira amateka y’ubuzima bwe bwite.

Umukobwa ugukunda by’ukuri kandi ukwibonamo,arakwibwira wese. Nubwo abakobwa bakunda kwirekura no kuvuga amateka y’ubuzima bwabo,ariko iyo ageze aho akubwira byose byamubayeho,ibyo yaciyemo,iba ari intambwe nziza yo kukwizera no kukwimariramo. Ntiwabwira umuntu utizeye ubuzima bwawe cyangwa amateka yawe yahahise.Icyo ugomba kugenzura ,ni ukureba niba akubwira byose. Kukubwira byose hakubiyemo no kukubwira amakosa n’ingeso mbi zagiye zimuranga mu hahise he. Umukobwa ukubwira ibyiza gusa yagiye akora cyangwa byamubayeho,uzamugireho ikibazo,utangire no kumukemanga,kuko aba ashaka kukuryarya.

Written by Jean

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